April 25

FLORIDA, FLORIDA, FLORIDA WITH GEORGIA ON MY MIND

Disney, DeSantis and Mizelle – not a law firm, but it sings with echoes of the phrase, “Florida, Florida, Florida!”, as popularized by the late newsman Tim Russert, which is where much of the nation’s news was centered this week. Leading off the barrage was U.S. District Judge Kathryn Kimball Mizelle’s striking down the federal travel mask mandate, with major airlines then telling domestic passengers to show their faces! Mizelle, a 2020 Trump appointee with just over a year’s service was promptly in the spotlight, with critics reminding the public that she was confirmed even after being given a ‘not qualified‘ rating by the American Bar Association, based on her limited experience. The judge maintains that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention had overstepped its authority in requiring masks on public transportation, but which most legal experts considered to be valid to prevent the spread of COVID-19. 

The CDC is appealing the decision to put the issue before the appellate court, which is, unfortunately, the conservative 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals. Unless the ruling is overturned, experts worry that Judge Mizelle has hampered the agency’s ability to respond to future health crises. Generally speaking, the states have responsibility for health measures, with the feds having a more limited role; but, Congress has the authority to pass a law giving the CDC more power – or to curtail its judgements. For now, our doctors don’t have to ask the local judge for permission to write our prescriptions, but if attacks on health agencies which erode the public trust continue unabated who knows where we end up? “Oh, you say you have a slipped disc…well, what was the judge’s verdict?” “Think you have an STD? Not on the docket for six more weeks!” Can’t wait to see the stethoscope draped over the black robe as the magistrate holds court!

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis concluded his feud with Disney World by signing the bill stripping the corporation of its self-governing ability, which in 1967 was entitled the Reedy Creek Improvement Act, giving the park its tax privilege in a special district status. Disney, as the state’s largest private employer with 80,000 on the payroll, ran afoul of DeSantis and his mob after speaking out against Florida’s recently enacted ‘Parental Rights in Education Act,’ commonly known as the ‘Don’t Say Gay‘ bill, which outlines new statutes for primary education, gathering criticism far and wide for prohibiting primary students from learning about gender identity. Opponents of the bill state that it could further stigmatize LGBTQ students, and that schools should be the place where such topics are discussed, with some legal scholars suggesting the vaguely worded bill might eventually be ruled unconstitutional. While DeSantis stays on his crusade to out-Trump Trump on the path to 2024, he is likely to see hackles raised among property owners in counties neighboring Disney World, with their property taxes increasing up to 20 percent annually. A $2 billion shortfall will have to be made up by residents with an average $2,200 per household, with local municipalities being responsible for roads, sewage and approval for any expansion of the park.

Florida Conservative’s punishment against a corporation that dared to take a side in politics is being watched closely by other state parties, with the GOP traditionally being business-friendly while garnering contributions from those protected entities. One individual predicted that if right-wingers tend to stay away from Disney World and Disneyland, they will TRULY become ‘The Happiest Places on Earth.’ 

Unable to leave well-enough alone, the Florida Commissioner of Education announced the rejection of 54 MATH textbooks submitted by publishers for the coming school year, saying that 26 of those contained ‘prohibited topics,’ including Critical Race Theory and Social-Emotional Learning. Governor Ron DeSantis chimed in with, “It seems that some publishers attempted to slap a coat of paint on the old house built on the foundation of Common Core, and indoctrinating concepts like race essentialism, especially, bizarrely, for elementary students.” Scant proof was offered to support these claims, but it seems that if one is afraid to use or read a book that might change one’s thinking, then you’re not afraid of books, you’re afraid of thinking. As Oscar Wilde maintained, “The books that the world calls ‘immoral,’ are books that show the world its own shame.” That goes for math books, too, Guv’ner!

Posted notice in a bookstore: ‘PLEASE NOTE – For your convenience, the Post-Apocalyptic Fiction section has been moved to Current Affairs.’ Actor and Reading Rainbow host, LeVar Burton, says, “There are plenty of books to choose from, but you know what? No, read the books they don’t want you to. That’s where the good stuff is…read the banned books.”

This just in to the email folder (twice now): 

Patriot:
The Deep State is trying to kick me off the ballot.

Marjorie Taylor-Greene
Congresswoman (R-GA)

Poor Marj! The help she needs is way beyond our capabilities after seeing what those Jewish Space Lasers did to her brain, as exhibited in the Alabama courtroom on Friday – she failed to recall events from the past three years that still reverberate in our own minds. The three hour testimony to defend herself against a group of Georgia voters, calling themselves ‘Free Speech For People,’ are challenging her suitability for the ballot in her reelection bid, based on the so-called insurrection disqualification clause of the 14th Amendment. It’s bound to lead to more questioning before the House January 6 Committee before it’s over – surely they can provide some assistance in restoring her jumbled synapses. Missing from her Memory Box (but not from audio/video-recordings) are references to insurrectionists being referred to as ‘patriots,’ while those arrested are ‘political prisoners.’ She seems to have no recollection of opposing a peaceful transition of power to Joe Biden or to acknowledge Trump’s loss, as she called for a mass convergence on Washington for “our 1776 moment.” Discussing declaration of martial law with President Trump? Nope – didn’t deny it, just couldn’t remember doing so. Support of QAnon? Nahhh – but rigorous support of their theories!  Myth has it that humans only use 10% of our brain power, which flies in the face of evolution. Why would nature give us such a large, energy-consuming instrument for partial use? Scientists tell us that no part of the brain does nothing, so our little Marjorie may be a perfect specimen for some research. Her deposition in the hearing could result in a judge ordering her removal from the ballot, and since she perjured herself constantly, with opposing counsel calling out her lies with proof, it provides grounds for a judge to favor her opponents. Perjury charges rarely follow a civil suit, though possible, but Taylor-Greene could appeal should her ballot presence be disallowed. But even so, this is a momentous case and we can be certain that the Department of Justice was watching closely, along with other potential prosecutors. Madison Cawthorn, take heed! And, Lauren Boebert, you may be next in line!

Fox Nation is airing Piers Morgan’s new show, Piers Morgan Uncensored, featuring an interview with former president, Donald Bumbledore, purported to be a fiery one-on-one with Donny ‘foaming at the mouth.’ Morgan says he was called a ‘fool’ six times by the orange-hued interviewee, who also had choice names for former VP Pence, and Senate Minority Leader McConnell. Release of several video clips show some contentious moments, with the former prez asking that the interview be concluded – “We’re done!” But somehow, Morgan lured him back, probably with a promise of a Mac ‘N Fries, ending the interview with Trump’s braggadocio of scoring a recent hole-in-one in his golf game. Whew – a hard-hitting exchange in the end! Don’t miss it. 

In closing, let’s all sing or hum along:
It’s a small-minded world, after all; It’s a small-minded world, after all, 
It’s a small, small-minded worrrrrllld!