GIVING NOTHING, WHO’S ON FIRST, WINGED PALACE, TROPHIES

For a short time it was nice for followers of President Trump’s Truth Social media platform, when they read his simple message, “`HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY!” However, his short wish was actually a temporary replacement for an earlier, typical, Trumpian all-caps, ugly screed unleashed upon the opposition, which was full of typos that needed corrections by his handlers. Upon reposting the edited original, Trump added more all-caps sentences, perhaps toning it down only marginally, with praise for himself and his administration’s “great progress.” A post on Sunday night found The Don going after Vladimir Putin for escalating Russian attacks on Kyiv, Ukraine, dubbing him as “absolutely crazy,” rebuking the largest drone attack in the three-year war. The month of May marks the bombardments on Ukraine as record-setting, with Russia breaking its record on aerial attacks three times, as it assembles forces for a summer offensive according to analysts. Trump has threatened more sanctions for Russia as he loses patience with Vlad, but he also is critical of Ukraine’s Zelensky who is being too verbose in his criticism of lack of global support, in Trump’s view. So, Putin needs to back off, Zelensky needs to shut his mouth, or Trump’s coveted Nobel Peace Prize fades to black — a trophy that holds the highest significance in settling the war to our dear leader.

Satirist Andy Borowitz writes in The Borowitz Report of Trump’s Memorial Day activity: “In what has become a Memorial Day tradition for him, on Monday Donald J. Trump laid a wreath at the Tomb of the Unknown Podiatrist. Trump made his annual pilgrimage to pay homage to the heroic doctors who issued bogus diagnoses to ensure that their privileged patients never answered the call of duty. In an emotional tribute, Trump thanked the fallen foot specialists who bravely risked their medical licenses so that others facing military service could be free. Choking back tears, he said, “They gave everything so people like me could give nothing.”

Observers are being wary about who is actually in charge in the Oval Office, with the president signing over 150 executive orders in the same ritualized event — cameras present, staff standing by along with invited guests — and the chief executive appearing to barely know what he is signing. Trump is marginally attentive as the White House Staff Secretary reads a brief summary of the order, as the president interjects with a question or two which may indicate he hasn’t read it or is unfamiliar with it, whether only a few pages or many. The Daily Beast reports of one instance when Trump asked, “Are we doing something about the regulatory here?” Answering were several businessmen who were in attendance, and Interior Secretary Burgum, with a “you are sir,” followed by Trump asking, “Is that it?” “That’s all we have for you now, sir,” came the answer, as Trump then invited questions about the orders to be addressed to the “brilliant” experts, rather than toward him. Critic Fred Wellman, a graduate of West Point (and an Army vet of 22 years service), political consultant, and graduate of the Harvard Kennedy School, simply says, “He is not in charge.” Investment banker Evaristus Odinikaeze, remarked, “‘Is that it?’ while signing orders he doesn’t understand, parroting talking points he didn’t write, and pretending it’s leadership — peak performative confusion.”

Former running mate of Robert F. Kennedy Jr, Nicole Shanahan, recently speculated that somebody is “controlling” Kennedy’s decisions in his role at the Department of Health and Human Services, following the announcement that Dr. Casey Means was named to become the next Surgeon General. Shanahan says she was promised that neither Casey nor her brother, Calley, would be working in HHS, if she gave her support toward Kennedy’s Senate confirmation, being assured that much more qualified people would be considered. She said, “I don’t know if RFK lied to me, or what is going on. It has been clear in recent conversations that he is reporting to someone regularly who is controlling his decisions — and it isn’t President Trump.” Could it be the infamous brain worm?

Politico reports that after the DOGE/Elon Musk destruction of government agencies, Trump and his gang “have gone awfully quiet on the world’s richest man.” Musk was a constant at the White House, always given space on the president’s social media posts and in his fundraising email grifts, the Tesla/X-world CEO has fallen into disfavor, hardly mentioned in briefings, with only quietude among congressional members. Musk could only serve as a special government employee for 130 days, ending in late May, but he leaves in his wake the DOGE staff who will continue to work with Trump’s cabinet “to make our government more efficient,” says Press Secretary Leavitt. It has become apparent that the $2 trillion savings promised will not come about. It also seems that Trump started a Truth Social blackout of Musk after he experienced a 10 point, humiliating loss in the Wisconsin Supreme Court race after plunking down $21 million for Trump’s preferred candidate in a low-profile, non-partisan judicial contest. Without a doubt, Wisconsin’s electorate found Musk’s onstage cheesehead antics, and his handing out checks for a million bucks to some voters to be over the top. “He’s finished, done, gone. He polls terrible. People hate him. He’d go to Wisconsin thinking he can buy people’s votes, wear the cheese hat, act like a 9-year old…it doesn’t work. It’s offensive to people,” said an anonymous GOP operative. A Marquette University Law School poll found that 58% of respondents disapproved of Musk and his DOGE-boys secretive task force, and 60% disapproved of Musk personally. Musk himself is likely pulling away due to his personal business downturns, with Tesla profits plummeting 71% in the first quarter, and with grumblings emanating from the board members in all his holdings. He and Trump don’t see eye to eye on the new tariffs, with Trump continuing to stir up more confusion globally.

Politico sees Republicans still are attempting to stay in the good graces of Musk, hoping his massive fortune and X social media platform continue to support their campaigns, even as he signals that he might wind down his political activity which would be a big blow after his massive support in 2024. GOP strategist Alex Conant said, “Anytime the biggest donor says he’s going to pull back, that’s a concern for the party. These megadonors, you have to earn their support every cycle. He says he’s planning to pull back, but if we have a presidential nominee in ’28 that excites Musk, you can see him doubling down.” Musk was asked if his decision was because of blowback, saying, “If I see a reason to do political spending in the future, I will do it. I do not currently see a reason. In terms of political spending, I’m going to do a lot less in the future. I think I’ve done enough.” Republican strategist Brian Seitchik argues, “Musk has the luxury of changing his mind at a moment’s notice. He has the luxury of being angry, irritated or inspired in the coming months and will decide how to spend. It would simply mean that Republicans have less money. It’s not as though they have no money.” Democratic Representative Greg Casar of Texas pointed out that Musk was recently on Capitol Hill, meeting with Republicans on energy and artificial intelligence, saying on X, “Elon Musk isn’t gone, and we can’t let Republicans pretend he is, just because he’s unpopular now. We have to keep the pressure until we actually Fire Elon Musk.” “Anyone actually believe he’s stepping back?” asks Representative Mark Pocan. “Musk is just hiding in the closet, but he’s still in the room.”

Musk’s troubles were exacerbated this past weekend, when social media platform X went down temporarily, along with other glitches, resulting in a multitude of complaints and comments by users. He posted that, “I’m back to spending 24/7 at work and sleeping in conference/server/factory rooms. I must be super focused on X/xAI and Tesla (plus Starship launch), as we have critical technologies rolling out. As evidenced by the X uptime issues this week, major operational improvements need to be made.” One commenter posted, “And, this was the guy Trump brought in to make government more efficient?” The Washington Post wrote, “Politics has been central to Musk’s identity over much of the past year, but his latest obsession has faded into disenchantment over the personal costs and difficulties in producing results. Musk has also become deeply concerned for the personal safety of his family. He also did not anticipate the level of backlash against him personally or against his companies, including incidents of violence at Tesla facilities.” Musk was present at a Cabinet meeting on April 30, where President Trump told him, “We all want to thank you for your help. You really have sacrificed a lot.” But as Janna Brancolini wrote on The Daily Beast, “Everyone knows, though, how strongly Trump feels about losers.”

Andy Borowitz found another topic that deserves one of his satirical treatments: “Vowing to usher in a ‘golden age of chocolate,’ on Wednesday Donald J. Trump called for Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory to be reopened. ‘I saw a show about it on TV, and it never should have been allowed to close down,’ he said. ‘It never would have happened if I was president. What was done to Willy Wonka was a disgrace,’ he said, adding that the chocolatier had been ‘treated very unfairly.’ We used to make beautiful chocolate in this country,’ he said. ‘We’re not winning at chocolate anymore.'” Anybody? Mary Rose and Ian Mackenzie?

One thing — for real — that Trump sees as a winning move is acceptance of the Boeing 747 ‘Flying Palace’ luxury jet from Qatar that he insists will be converted into Air Force One — after taxpayers foot the bill for a $1 billion+ makeover to meet security regulations for a US president. The bribe was formally confirmed by NewsNation as the Defense Department and Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth took possession “in accordance with all federal rules and regulations” this past week. Pentagon spokesperson Sean Parnell said in his statement, “The Department of Defense will work to ensure proper security measures and functional-mission requirements are considered for an aircraft used to transport the President of the United States,” referring further questions to the US Air Force. The $400 million bribe for the 13 year-old jet is akin to accepting the castoff socks and underwear for an item that is no longer good enough for the royal family of Qatar, but our orange-hued president sees the gold fixtures and trappings to be fit for his kingly aspirations. The upgrade to the ‘Flying Palace’ is estimated to be a three- or four-year project, ready for use about the same time as the two new Boeing jets that have been on order since the first Oval Office desecration of Trump Inc. Boeing attributes their three-year production delay to a worker’s strike, complicated nature of new upgrades such as enhanced self-defense systems, and completing security clearances of the various contractors.

According to a Civiqs poll for Daily Kos, 55% of registered voters believe it to be unethical for Trump to accept the plane, which he claims will temporarily serve as the new Air Force One, which would then be transferred into the ownership of his future presidential library, BUT made available for his private use after leaving office! Only 19% of voters believe the bribe to be ethical, and another 22% don’t see it as an ethics issue, but Democrats are overwhelmingly critical — 92% saying it’s unethical, and even 55% of independents agree it crosses the line. Trump defends the ‘transferral,’ saying it would be “stupid” not to accept the “gift,” but he insists upon ignoring the emoluments clause of the Constitution which bans federal officials from accepting gifts, payments, or favors from foreign powers without Congressional approval. The White House and Department of Justice argue that the gift was not unconstitutional because it was not given to an individual — so it becomes a gift to an individual when the taxpayers GIVE it to an ex-president? King Donald is the only modern US president to challenge the restrictions, but then he’s been allowed to profit from all his side hustles of Bibles, guitars, meme coins, and taking advantage of that official presidential seal. Democratic voters refuse to let this slide, and if the rest of the electorate can catch up, the Trump Crime Family may find the ConGame to be nearing a finale. Andy Borowitz writes that, “Qatar inked a historic agreement to acquire a president of the United States, but critics argued that the president it bought was in poor condition and not fully functional. Additionally, the critics noted, he was preowned, having previously been purchased by Vladimir Putin, Elon Musk, and dozens of others. For his part, the emir brushed off such criticism, telling reporters,’He can’t possibly be worth less than that [crappy] old 747.'” One critic commented, “This is like a combination of ‘Fixer Upper’ and ‘Pimp My Ride.’ It’s going to cost a lot of money.” Considering that the aircraft will need to be stripped of its interior, its outer skin and down to the airframe for retrofitting and reassembly of the gold toilets, who wants to place bets on the timeline?

NBC News reports that “the White House has scrubbed its website of transcripts from President Trump’s speeches and appearances, hiding his lies, unhinged comments, and even moments when world leaders have rebuked his statements.” Those transcripts were on the website as recently as last week, but a shift in the administration’s communications policy, leaving only videos of those moments with no accompanying transcripts. While the transcripts exist, with official government stenographers recording Trump’s public appearances, nothing appears on the website. So, the question is — what is being hidden? Does this further tighten control over Trump’s image, even with mainstream media declining to report stories that may be critical of him? Or are larger issues concerning the president’s mental and physical health prompting the White House to obscure his blathering from the public? Aren’t we entitled to see the colorful rant about washing his hair, as he signed an executive order on water pressure? How about the one closer to home, when he raved about “invading Los Angeles to open up the water”? Or the one about his promise to bring down the price of eggs, which he said he accomplished with a 93% reduction? Know anybody out there who bought eggs for $0.13 per dozen? And of course, who wouldn’t want to read the transcript of his discourse on the word ‘groceries‘? Also missing is the recent Oval Office ambush of South African President Cyril Ramaphosa, when Trump presented his “white genocide” diatribe with fake web pages to embarrass his guest, who was obviously taken aback. Those transcript omissions make it perfectly clear that the White House wants to hide the president from his critics.

One recent appearance that Trump’s handlers would like to be erased completely is his speech to the West Point graduates last weekend, a speech that appropriately fell on its face with the audience. Again, the president tried to make his attendance into a political rally, airing grievances, drifting off-script into the brambles, bragging about his election victory in November and whining about being investigated. He had to be thoroughly disappointed in the response, which resulted in his leaving the event quickly without shaking the hands of the graduates, to get to the golf course. Wearing his red MAGA cap, Trump delivered what strategist and lawyer Aaron Parnas called a “‘strikingly unconventional’ school address, blending political rhetoric, off-the-cuff remarks, and personal anecdotes, deviating sharply from the traditional tone of such events.” The Don made headlines with his ‘trophy wives’ comments, one observer calling it a complete lack of presidential decorum. His opinion given to the grads on marrying “trophy wives,” when he advised them, “A lot of trophy wives doesn’t (sic) work out,” raised not a few eyebrows. Minor league baseball franchise owner, Lou DiBella, posted on X, “Ladies and Gentlemen, the President of the United States! A lesson on trophy wives; how inspiring for our future Army officers at their commencement. Nice MAGA hat…how appropriate! Consider this one instead on next graduation day.” Economist Patrick Chovanec suggested, “The only difference between a MAGA hat and KKK hood is that the KKK were ashamed to show their faces.” Veteran Daniel Larsen added, “Orange blob menace psychopath convicted felon MAGA cult leader rambled and dissembled. Wearing that hat to a West Point commencement is high crimes and misdemeanors. Impeach this idiot.”

And speaking of Melania, sources say that she has spent fewer than two weeks at the White House since inauguration day in January, appearing with the president at the Pope’s funeral and at the annual White House Easter Egg Roll. Some sources say that her fourteen day presence might be a generous estimate, but is discounted by Paolo Zampolli, a modeling agent, who says, “She loves the White House and loves her role of serving as our First Lady.” Just not living there full time? Even regulars at Mar-a-Lago say she is scarce around the Florida resort. Melania just announced she is releasing a new audiobook in a few months — to be narrated in an artificial intelligence version of her voice — not a new offering, only her 2024 memoir which was entitled ‘Melania.’ The English version is on sale for $25, a seven hour slog, with various foreign language versions expected in the future. Admirers have written, “Thanks for making America elegant again!” Something’s missing there!

Writer Fran Lebowitz doesn’t mention anything about the term ‘First Lady,’ but in the Fran Lebowitz Reader, she says, “Lest you get the impression that I am totally opposed to the word ‘lady,’ I rush to assure you that I think it is a perfectly nice word when used correctly. The word ‘lady’ is used correctly only as follows: a) To refer to certain female members of the English aristocracy. b) In reference to girls who stand behind lingerie counters in department stores, but only when preceded by the word ‘sales.’ c) To alert a member of the gentle sex to the fact that she is no longer playing with a full deck. As in, ‘Lady, what are you — nuts or something?’ d) To differentiate between girls who [are ‘easy’] and girls who [aren’t]. Girls who are ‘easy’ are tramps. Girls who aren’t are ladies. This is, however, an archaic usage of the word. Should one of you boys happen upon a girl who [isn’t ‘easy’], do not jump to the conclusion that you have found a lady. What you have probably found is a lesbian.” A favorite Fran quote: “Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not possibly have met.” Fran gets the last word.